Michael Cera Sexppreciation Day
If you know me very well at all, then you'll know that I think Arrested Development is the greatest band sitcom ever made. It reaches a level of comedy so far advanced beyond any other (and yes, I do think that there is a sense of "advancement" in comedic stylings, which is precisely why 30 year old sitcoms are not really funny anymore), that it along with the Simpsons has inspired a great deal of my thoughts on the essence of humour.
But rather than spend pages and pages attempting to virtually sexually gratify a canceled TV show, I want to focus on one member of that brilliant ensemble: Michael Cera. While Jason Bateman has biggest history, Will Arnett played the goofiest character, and David Cross is not only my favourite stand-up comedian but also responsible for the greatest sketch comedy show ever, I think that we may look back and think that the brightest star belongs to Cera. A suspicion I've had ever since the very first time airing of the first episode of the show, in which the first lines (chronologically) were:
Michael: What do we always say is the most important thing?
George Michael (Cera's character): Breakfast.
Michael: No, family.
G-M: Oh right. I thought you meant out of the things you eat.
For all of those people who thought that Arrested Development's failings rating-wise were due to the fact that it was HIGHLY complex and self-referential (the show's jokes constitute a dizzying set of circles within circles within spirals within rhombuses...while Seinfeld's last scene mirrors its first one, basically every scene in AD was packed with references to another)...that is patently untrue. This opening bit of dialogue, with the perfect way in which it was performed, instantly showed how hilarious the show really was. Those 4 lines were all one needed to recognize that fact. Failure to get the show is just a defect, pure and simple...and maddeningly enough one that the vast majority of Americans suffer from!
But no need to lament, because despite its early demise, AD showed us all the light, and Michael Cera is one of the shiniest fucking bulbs around. While I instantly had a crush on Alia Shakwat (who plays Maebe, pictured above), she is (still) underage, which made that crush technically wrong. However, she and George Michael come to fall for each other, and they're cousins - that redemption of incest makes my virtua-crush ok. And it also legitimizes my desire for Michael Cera, which is strange, because I'm not even gay. But I'll still fuck the daylights out of him as an means of honoring and submitting to his glory if I ever get the chance! It is a matter of duty.
Which would make me Katherine Hairgel (or whatever the fuck her name is, being from Grey's Anatomy, she doesn't deserve my bothering to learn what it really is) in this following send-up of the craziness that went down on the I Heart Huckabees set:
This shows just how well set up Michael Cera is for the future. Getting in on the Judd Apatow money train means that he's set for life. Of course he has so much talent he doesn't need that, but it is exciting to know that he is an heir-apparent in Apatow's comedy money juggernaut. His first movie produced by Apatow is Superbad, which seems like one of the best upcoming movies this year. And there's another Apatow/Cera movie in the works
And there's also the web episodes of Clark and Michael.
So in a few years from now when your lungs and loins have exploded from seeing too much Cera hilarity and sexiness all over the place...don't say I didn't warn you.
Random sidenote: Don't search google images for "Laura Schlessinger" (Dr Laura)!! Unless you're not at work and want to contribute to her humiliation. I stumbled across this as a total accident when doing some research for a comment I left on this person's website, which I found when trying to figure out the commands for using strike through, which was necessary to make my lame/overused Arrested Development band/show joke above. It is funny where the internet takes you....
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